Q-Eng

Mokshaっていう言葉を覚えました。勉強になりました。「あの子可愛い」ふうむ。天上天下唯我独尊ではなかったんですね。一人の世界より二人の世界。

可愛いオチで　ほんわかなりました　＾＾ｗ　うふふ
解脱ねぇ、ちょっと前に流行りましたね。この単語。。。。
あら、まとまらなくてごめんなすって。

娘さんほど面白い女性はそうはいないと思います。いつも娘さんを教えていますが授業が楽しくて仕方がありません。ある意味、娘さんこそ解脱していると思います。

>One day Kegani learned about “moksha” in her ethic class at school.
>>One day Kegani learned about “moksha” in her ethic[s] class at school.

>”Moksha” in Buddhism means that getting your mind moving freely without suffering from adhering rigidly to your foul passion.
>>”Moksha” in Buddhism means [freeing yourself from earthly desires, or achieving a state of nirvana.]

This is a hard thing to describe, isn't it? I think most people will understand if you say "freeing yourself from earthly desires," even though it isn't a very specific description. "Nirvana" is a term most English-speaking people will probably recognize, too, which I think is the same thing as "Moksha."

>A few days after, Kegani took a train with her classmates.
>>A few days [later], Kegani took a train with her classmates [to...]

When you say "Kegani took a train with her classmates", it sounds like there should be more information, such as where they took the train to. Without that information, I think it would be better to say something like "A few days later, Kegani was on a train with her classmates."

>One boy of them had an absent expression with his eyes open incompletely during the ride.
>>[One of the boys among them] had an absent expression, with his eyes [only half open], during the ride.
>>[One of the boys] had...

I think this sounds better without "them" or "among them", since we can understand from the previous sentence that "one of the boys" must be a part of the group of classmates that Kegani was with.

>Looking at him, some boys of them were so interested in his situation, and talked to each other with a sense of amusement, “Look! His unseeing eyes! He attained moksha!”. “Wow! At last He was released from worldly desires.” ” That’s right. Great!” They laughed.
>>Looking at him, some [of the other] boys were so interested in his situation [that they] talked to each other with a sense of amusement, “Look! His unseeing eyes! He [has] attained moksha!”. “Wow! At last, he [has been] released from worldly desires.” ” That’s right. Great!” They laughed.

>After a while, the boy rose his right hand slowly and pointed his finger into air with keeping his abstracted gaze. Others watched him without a word, wondering what he would do. Then he opened his mouth and said in a slow way, “The girl there is so pretty.”
>>After a while, the boy [raised] his right hand slowly and pointed his finger into [the] air with keeping his abstracted gaze. [The] others watched him without a word, wondering what he would do. Then he opened his mouth and [slowly] said, “The girl there is so pretty.”

"Raised" should be used here instead of "rose" because "raise" is used with a direct object, while "rise" is not. I found this nice little explanation on the internet:

~~~
The verb "to raise" must ALWAYS have a direct object (a noun that receives the action of the verb)
Any time a form of the verb RAISE is used, it must have a direct object.

The verb "to rise" NEVER has a direct object.

EXAMPLE:
Incorrect: Stan rose his hand to quiet the crowd.
Correct: Stan raised his hand to quiet the crowd.
~~~

>Enjoy your blossom of youth with fire.
>>Enjoy the blossom of [your] youth."

I understand what you wanted to say at the end there, but it sounded a little awkward and I couldn't think of a very good way to word it myself. (^^;) If I can think of something better later, I'll write another comment, but this was all that I could think of right now...sorry!